It takes a lot of campaigning to win, especially when it comes to mid-level independent news magazine polls. Some of the winners don't deserve to win, or even be in that category. So, when I heard that my beloved Tacopocalypse didn't win anything (but was a runner up), I knew that I must post my response to the rest of the winners and losers.
Now, obviously, I won't have complete familiarity with all of the categories, and unlike most voters, I'll be upfront about it. I think that's the biggest problem. A LOT of people just vote for what's popular, not having first hand experience with the subject at hand.
Here we go!
Best New Restaurant: Eatery A.
Runners-up: Malo, RoCa.
Okay, I completely agree with this. I ADORE Eatery A, and clearly Des Moines does, too! They're amazing, and their chef just made semi-finalist for a James Beard award for Rising Star. I couldn't be happier for them. The food never fails to please and the cocktails are excellent.
I haven't been to RoCa (yet!), but I also love Malo. I don't have a review on my other blog for Malo or Eatery A, but take my word for it. They're great.
Best Family Restaurant: Zombie Burger.
Runners-up: Jethro's, Tursi's Latin King.
I can see how kids would love Zombie Burger. I don't have them, so I'm clearly not the expert on this one. I would not have voted in this category. Z-Burg is fun, vibrant, and while kid-friendly, aims for whimsical foodies.
I love Jethro's, I make no bones about that one. And I haven't been to Latin King since I was a kid, and I barely remember it. This category is out my wheelhouse.
Best Kept Secret on the Restaurant Scene: Marino's
Runners-up: Cooper's on 5th, Flying Mango.
I'm a bad foodie: I've never been to any of these places! I want to, I just haven't. Now, since I haven't been to them, I can't rate their place here.
But I CAN tell you that in my humble, but educated opinion, Hole in the Wall at Gas Lamp is the best kept secret in Des Moines. That link will lead you to the blog post (that I believe was scooped by the Reg, whatever), so I won't bore you with the details here. But they absolutely deserved a win here. I'm Team Hole in the Wall.
Best Restaurant Period: Centro
Runners-up: Zombie Burger, Jethro's
Okay. I've been to Centro. Frankly, I think they're overrated. Don't get me wrong, they're great. Excellent. George Fomaro is kind of a genius. But Best in Des Moines? I don't think so. I'd give that honor to Americana or to Eatery A. Fong's would definitely get a nod, here. And definitely HoQ Can we please stop giving certain restaurants "Best of" year after year based on that one time you ate there? Thanks.
Best Fine Dining: Centro
Runners-up: Fleming's, Django
I think I'd agree with this one. I haven't had the pleasure of eating at Fleming's or inside Django (there was a street fair, it was amazing). I'm a poor kid, so fine dining is out my reach. I'm surprised that 801 and Baru 66 aren't on the list, but maybe they're too far out of reach for the average voter, too.
Best Chef: George Fomaro
Runners-up: Tom McKern, Sam Auen.
SAM AUEN FOR THE WIN! I've met Sam Auen through mutual friends on a few occasions, and I doubt he remembers me, but I adore his work. He's a fucking genius, and I'm looking forward to the opening of Krunkwich in April.
Not to be seen as against Fomaro or McKern, I'm just a Sam Stan.
Best Wait Staff: Centro
Runners-up: Zombie Burger, John and Nick's
Centro, sure. Zombie Burger? Absolutely not. On a recent visit, I paid for lunch as it was a male friend's birthday. With my card. My name is Elizabeth, which cannot be confused with a masculine name. The server gave him the check after swiping my card. So that tells me that they pay little attention to detail and uphold casual sexism. yay! No.
I do agree with Centro, as every experience I've had was delightful.
Best Valley Junction Restaurant: Celsi's Tavern Restaurant
Runners-up: Cooper's on 5th, G Mig's 5th Street Pub.
Another category I'm not even going to take a shot at. The last time I really ate in Valley Junction was at a now defunct Mexican Italian restaurant owned by a classmate of my ex-bf. And it was terrible.
Best West Glen Restaurant: Bonefish Grill
Runners-up: Wellman's Rooftop, Wok in Motion.
I'm anti-West Des Moines. If it's not in DSM Proper, I don't give a fuck about it. Also, isn't Bonefish a chain? Way to go, suburbanites.
Best East Village Restaurant: Zombie Burger
Runners-up: Alba, Lucca
No. Le Sigh. Tacopocalypse for the win! I'm sure that Alba and Lucca are great. Having not been to either, I'm not the expert here. I still stand by my statement that Tacopocalypse is legit the best.
Best Drake Area Restaurant: Drake Diner
Runners-up: Jethro's, Woody's Smoke Shack
I'm a big, big Jethro's fan. And I 100% believe that the people who voted for Drake Diner over Jethro's are old and haven't been to Jethro's. The end.
Best Beaverdale Area Restaurant: Christopher's
Runners-up: Chef's Kitchen, Flying Mango
Not my category, so I have no opinion. But SNOOKIE'S FOREVER.
Best Ingersoll Area Restaurant: Eatery A
Runners-up: Star Bar, Sakari Sushi Lounge.
Yes, yes, YES! 100% agree.
SIDE NOTE: WHY ISN'T THERE A "BEST SOUTH SIDE AREA" OR "BEST ALTOONA AREA"??
Best American Food: Americana
Runners-up: Zombie Burger, Jethro's.
I agree with this one. Definitely.
Best Vegetarian/Vegan: New World Café
Fresh Café and Market, Ritual Café
No opinion, as I love meat.
Best Gluten-Free Menu: Gusto
Runners-up: New World Café, Fresh Café and Market.
Why is this a thing?? The gluten intolerant are a small population. Why aren't there Lactose Free Menus? Stop this craziness.
Best Italian: Latin King
Runners-up: Tumea & Sons, Centro
You can't be a Des Moines institution for nothing. Agree.
Best Mexican: Tasty Tacos
Runners-up: El Rodeo, Monterrey
Are you fucking kidding me?? Tasty Tacos is not Mexican. It's gringo. It's American as cranberry sauce and Hershey's chocolate. Are they tasty? Yes, it's in the name. Mexican? Get the fuck out of there.
This win goes to Mi Mexico or Los Laureles. REAL Mexican food.
Best Thai: Cool Basil
Runners-up: Thai Flavors, Blu Thai and Sushi
No opinion to give.
Best Chinese: Hy-Vee Chinese Express
Runners-up: China Café, Tsing Tsao
Hahahahahah. No. Nononono. Who voted for this shit?? This is laughable. I don't even know what the best Chinese in town is, but I KNOW it's not Hy-Vee. I love Hy-Vee as a grocery store, but no. Even P.F. Chang's is better.
Also, Tsing Tsao used to be awesome. Not anymore.
Best Japanese: Taki
Runners-up: Akebono, Miyabi 9
Not familiar with Taki, but I adore Akebono. Love the patio in the summer.
Best Mediterranean: Fresh Mediterranean
Runners-up: Open Sesame, Olympic Flame
No opinion. But they're all on the list!
Best Vietnamese: A Dong
Runners-up: Vietnam Café, Pho 888
YASSSS! A Dong is a hipster paradise, and I wouldn't have it any other way.
Best Seafood: Waterfront
Runners-up: Bonefish Grill, Splash
I don't really have an opinion, but I'm pleasantly surprised that Red Lobster wasn't nominated.
Best Sushi: Wasabi Chi
Runners-up: Sakari, The Mongolian Buffet (Ames)
No. I know Wasabi Chi and Wasabi Tao are owned by the same people, but Tao is definitely better. I've never had veins (poop) in my shrimp at Tao, unlike Chi.
Also, Akebono is the best! Sakari is awesome, too. But a fucking buffet?? In AMES?? Get your shit together, Des Moines.
Best Hibachi: Ohana Steakhouse
Runners-up: Taki, Appare
No opinion, but I want to have one. Read: Someone take me to Ohana!
Best Steakhouse: John and Nick's
Runners-up: 801, Chicago Speakeasy
Sure, I guess. I'm not familiar with any of these, except Chicago Speakeasy. But it's been years. So, eh. Rube's is excellent, though. I vote for Rube's. Which is in Waukee. And I've already expressed my hatred for non-Des Moines proper places.
Best Breakfast: Waveland Café
Runners-up: Jethro's, Perk Up Café
I'm going to whole heartedly vote for Mullet's here. All day, erryday.
Best Deli: Palmer's
Runners-up: Hagar's Manhattan Deli, B&B Market
YES! Three-way tie here. I want to live and die in a Palmer's. Manhattan Deli is so so good. B&B is a childhood icon. Way to go, Des Moines. No sarcasm.
Best Burger: B-Bop's
Runners-up: Big City Burgers and Greens, Zombie Burger
Am I alone in hating B-Bop's burgers?? I love their fries, but the burgers aren't good. I've never been to Big City, since they're open at asinine hours. And Z-Burg is good, but my favorite is the High Life Cheeseburger. It's fucking perfection. That is all.
Best Pizza: Gusto
Runners-up: Fong's, Pagliai's, NYC Pizza
YES! I'd tie Gusto and Fong's for first. Agreed. Big Tomato is also great, but I just can't deal with how proud they are of lousy service.
Best Bakery: Hiland Bakery
Runners-up: La Mie, South Union
Another YES! Hiland Bakery is absolutely the best in town! La Mie is also amazing, and South Union makes the best bread.
Best Cupcakes: Scratch
Runners-up: Crème, Della Dulce
Not being familiar with Scratch (it's in West Des Moines), I can't judge. But Crème is my JAM! I'm the mayor on Foursqaure, so if that says anything. Love it.
Best Burrito: Bandit Burrito
Runners-up: Abelardo's, Tacopocalypse
YES! It's hard to choose between these three, because they're SO different. Bandit def falls in the Gringo Burrito category, Abelardo's is very southern California, and Tacopocalypse is fusion at its absolute finest.
Best Dessert: Crème
Runners-up: Scratch, La Mie
Another agree. Crème has a rotating, seasonal menu full of decadent, rich, and out of this world desserts.
Best BBQ: Jethro's
Runners-up: Woody's, Smokey D's
I've never had Smokey D's from the actual restaurant, but from the satellite in the Nationwide building. No. But they win so many championships, that it blows my mind. Jethro's is spectacular.
Best Onion Rings: Maxie's
Runners-up: Celcie's Tavern, Nick's
I haven't not had the pleasure of Maxie's, but Nick's is by far my favorite in town.
Best French Fries: Zombie Burger
Runners-up: Smashburger, B-Bop's
Agreed. ZB has the best poutine, which is built on a foundation of amazing fries! B-Bop's also has great fries.
Best Chicken Wings: Jethro's
Runners-up: Buffalo Wild Wings, Chicken Coop
YASSS! I'd punch a baby for a plate of Jethro's signature smoked wings.
I want to throw an honorable mention to Founder's in Bondurant.
Best Nachos: University Library Café
Runners-up: Jethro's, Zombie Burger.
Yes. Though I haven't enjoyed the Library nachos, they have a reputation that precedes them. I don't think Jethro's can be considered nachos, since they're built on waffle fries, but I'll allow it. They're amazing.
I want to throw another honorable mention to Founder's.
Best Taco: Tasty Tacos
Runners-up: Tacopocalypse, Malo
Tasty Tacos is great. Good, solid tacos. But do they beat Tacopocalypse or Malo? No. Not at all. Also, Henry J's is better. FYI.
Best Tenderloin: Smitty's
Runners-up: Nick's, Jethro's
No. Unless you WANT to have your mouth torn up by shards of glass and very little pork. Nick's is by far the best in town. And WHO goes to a BBQ place for tenderloins??
Best Soup: Palmer's
Runners-up: South Union, Gateway Market
Agreed. Palmer's is amazing. Only slightly better than South Union and Gateway. Shout out to Manhattan Deli.
Best Cheese Store: The Cheese Shop
Runners-up: Gateway, Hy-Vee
I love cheese, but I have no opinion.
Best Bar Food: Star Bar
Runners-up: High Life, Francie's
I'm only familiar with High Life, and I endorse it. Clearly.
Best Bistro Fare: Bistro Montage
Runners-up: Django, La Mie, Table 128
Sure. No idea.
Best Apps: Jethro's
Trostel's Dish, Americana, Eatery A
YESSSSSS. I'll endorse Jethro's, Americana, and Eatery A forever.
Best Coffee/Coffeehouse: Smokey Row
Runners-up: Zanzibar's, Java Joe's
Another YESSS. Smokey Row is hip, but has great service, great food, and excellent coffee. I'm really glad Ritual wasn't a runner up, because it's not. Just not.
Best Salad Bar: Chicago Speakeasy
Runners-up: John and Nick's, Hy-Vee
Sure. I don't know. It's salad.
Best Wine Selection: John and Nick's
Runners-up: Louie's Wine Dive, Django.
Sure?
Best Power Lunch: Centro
Runners-up: Palmer's, Chicago Speakeasy
Yes, Centro. Yes, Palmer's. Chicago Speakeasy?? No. It's way out of the way, and it's more of a family place. Americana, Eatery A, Django, Akebono. They seem more Power Lunch-y.
Best Place for a $5 Lunch: Tasty Tacos
Runners-up: Tacopocalypse, Hy-Vee
Tacopocalypse is my heart and soul.
Best Place for a $10 Dinner: Zombie Burger
Runners-up: A Dong, Tasty Tacos
Sure. I'd add Bandit Burrito, Abelardo's, Palmer's, Nick's Tenderloins, High Life, Hessen Haus, and Buzzard Billy's.
Best Place after 2AM: Fong's
Runners-up: Abelardo's, Big Tomato
I'd like to mention that only Abelardo's is actually open AFTER 2AM. Fong's and Big Tomato close before then. Winner, by default, is Abelardo's. But they'd win anyway.
Best Hangover Food: Zombie Burger
Runners-up: Waveland, Mullet's
Eating ZB with a hangover sounds like death from vomiting. Mullet's gets the win.
Best First Date Spot: Centro
Runners-up: Django, Eatery A
Agree, but add Americana.
Best Patio: Eatery A
Runners-up: Dos Rios, Zombie Burger
Yes! However, I HATE the "first come, first served" thing they have going on there. I waited for 30 minutes for a table, only to have it stolen. El Bait Shop/High Life is excellent, as well.
Best Doughnut: Dahl's
Runners-up: King Donut, Dunkin' Donut
Hiland Bakery FOEVER.
Best Caterer: Taste! To Go
Runners-up: Gateway, Hy-Vee
Sure. I guess. But not Hy-Vee.
Best Delivery: Thai Flavors
Runners-up: In the Bag, Hy-Vee
I don't think many people understand this category. Hy-Vee doesn't deliver. In The Bag is a catering company. SMDH
Best Food Truck: Nana's Sweet Treats
Runners-up: The Spot, Magnolia Kitchen, Melts without Borders
Sure?
Okay, I skipped a few categories, such as Best Domestic Beer and Best Restaurant Supply. Also, there was no Best Ice Cream category, which is a shame. (Snookie's! Classic Frozen Custard!!)
So, those are MY opinions. Humble, yet educated.
No comments:
Post a Comment